


when i'm no longer young and beautiful (will you still love me)

by forgive_me_not



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, One Shot, Richard is a sweetheart, gavin thinks too much, in times of need Lana Del Rey comes to me singing words of wisdom, songfic?, what more do i need to say
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-03 17:24:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15823524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forgive_me_not/pseuds/forgive_me_not
Summary: "Is there something wrong?""It's just..." He took a deep breath, and suddenly realized he was shaking."Do you love me?"Or: Sunday night thoughts.





	when i'm no longer young and beautiful (will you still love me)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Hi! Welcome! To my brand new reed900 oneshot!
> 
> The story is heavily inspired by the beautiful Lana Del Rey's song: 'Young and Beautiful', even though I wouldn't call it a songfic because??? I don't know how to write one lmao. It was also inspired by the lack of acknowledgment of other androids' hair-color-changing abilities on the fandom's part, smh. As always, please keep in mind that I'm not a native English speaker, so please excuse me if there are any weirdly structured sentences or awkward typos.
> 
> The story touches on some existential stuff, like dying and borderline immortality, stuff that naturally comes with human/android relationships. It's not too heavy in my opinion, but I know very well that it can easily be triggering, so just a heads up.
> 
> Enjoy!

Gavin watched his own hand in the mirror as it traced the hairline on his temple. He felt strangely empty grazing at the small hairs. The eyes of his reflection caught his own. In the cold light of the bathroom his face looked sickeningly pale. Every single scar on it was sharp and visible, misplaced contours of a life that was put on the line every day. There were bags under his eyes, and wrinkles around their corners, products of stress and a lack of sleep. His gaze flickered back to his hand.

  
Gray hair. A thin, silver lining between the tan of his skin and the dark of his sideburn. Barely noticeable. But there.

  
He was worn out.

  
Old.

  
Gavin huffed, and stared down at the sink. The water was running. He thought about closing the faucet, and then did nothing for a while. He absentmindedly tapped on the button of it, thoughts getting lost in the sound of rushing water. Strange. Dizziness found its way into his body. He probably shouldn't have eaten that half taco he found in the fridge that morning.

  
He stumbled out of the bathroom feeling lightheaded. His thoughts were all over the place, white noise filling his mind, his own little ocean inside his head.

  
He was drowning in it.

  
Richard was sitting on the couch in the living room, leaning against the armrest, loosely holding a book in one hand. His dark shirt was unbuttoned to his collarbones, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His posture was relaxed, and his face softened. He looked peaceful. Beautiful. So much so that he didn't even look real.

  
Richard looked up from the pages, right at Gavin. His bright eyes softened with affection, then hardened right back, worry flashing behind the lenses of his irises. The book slipped from his fingers as he leaned to ask:

  
"Is there something wrong?"

  
Gavin didn't respond immediately. He stood awkwardly in the middle of his own living room, weight shifting from one leg to the other, feeling lost.

  
"It's just..." He took a deep breath, and suddenly realized he was shaking. "Do you love me?"

  
Richard stood up. In the blink of an eye, he was standing inches away from Gavin, hands lightly on the man's arms. He was leaning forward, as if he wanted to inspect every single emotion his lover's face hid.

  
"Of course I love you," he said. "Why would you ever doubt that?"

  
Gavin kept staring ahead, avoiding the android's eyes.

  
"But will you still love me," he inhaled, his lungs shivering ever-so-slightly "five years later? Or ten, or twenty?"

  
"Gavin, what the hell are you talking about?"

  
"I mean, fuck," Gavin breathed out, almost a laugh to his voice, "I'm going to grow old and ugly, and won't be able to move or eat or speak, and you're going to leave me because you'll still be young and strong and beautiful, and more alive than ever before. You're going to leave me."

  
Richard's grasp tightened on his arm.

  
"Or worse," the man continued, "you're not going to leave me, you're going to be stuck with my clingy human ass until the day I die, and then I'm gonna be gone and I'll leave you all alone..."

  
"Gavin, stop spouting nonsense. You're a perfectly healthy thirty-nine year old man, you shouldn't be thinking about things like-..."

  
"Almost forty with already graying hair and a job where I could die any day." Gavin was speaking louder now, voice raised not by anger but by _sheer panic_. "I've lived up half my life, and what have I done with it?"

  
"You've prevented countless crimes by helping to capture dozens of dangerous criminals, Gavin," replied Richard without missing a beat. He was begging the other now, "Please, just listen to what you're saying."

  
"I'm going to die, Richie," Gavin gasped out. "I'm going to die one day, and you're still going to be here, exactly like the way you were when we first met-"

  
Richard grabbed the man's face with both hands, forcing Gavin to look at him. The man shut his mouth, so hard that his teeth clicked audibly, and fell silent. They stared into each other's eyes for ten solid seconds.

  
Then Richard's hair turned white.

  
Gavin blinked - and then the ugliest, most miserable laugh ripped from his mouth. It felt self-deprecating, an unhappy, wet sound.

  
"Oh my god," he breathed out, and looked away. "You're unbelievable."

  
Richard adjusted his head, so they were facing each other again. There was nothing funny about the way he looked at Gavin.

  
"Listen." He sounded serious. "I love you. You, and only you. And I will, until the day I die."

  
His touch was burning on Gavin's face. His gaze was unwavering, locking the man's eyes in place.

  
"I understand that matters like these concern you, and I would be lying if I said that I haven't thought about what would happen if-" Richard paused here, not sure how to finish the sentence. He decided not to finish it at all. "But there is no use in worrying about something that we have no control over." His thumb lightly traced over a faded scar. The android's body involuntarily imitated taking a deep breath. "What matters isn't what might or might not happen tomorrow - it's what is happening right now. What we can do to make the best of _now_."

  
Gavin closed his eyes. Swallowed. Tried to empty the static from his mind.

  
"Yeah," he nodded, with his head still held between Richard's hands. "Yeah."

  
"When we started this relationship, you and I both knew, that it would come with certain... complications, when it came to matters like these... but, Gavin, believe me when I say this; I love you."

  
He kissed the man; a small and innocent thing, barely a touch, planted on his lips. Just to say, 'I'm here. It's okay.' Gavin was still tense under his touch, but listening to his love's words, he was slowly easing up. And that was fine. Richard was patient.

  
"I love you, and I'll never stop loving you. And whatever hardships we have to face... we'll face them together."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! If you liked it, consider giving me kudos and comments, or come say hi to me over [tumblr!](https://forgiveme-not.tumblr.com/)
> 
> EDITED as of 2018. 12. 19.  
> Seriously, it had so many mistakes. I'm embarassed.


End file.
